My WORST Dating Experience | Dating someone in the closet | Gay Dating Advice | Jacob Michael

So one time I found myself dating someone in the closet and.. well, it wasn’t the greatest experience you could say 😓And today I’ll talk to you about why that is.

So yeah, buckle up and let’s get the frick into it 😎

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  1. Encountering enough examples of the ways in which performatively straight-acting guys can actually be (terrified to express themselves, emotionally closed off, game-playing), thankfully my attraction over time has leaned much more towards somewhere in the middle. A guy who loves himself, is emotionally open, and feels free to be self-expressed is just gonna be a much better date / partner / friend / husband. I now view overly straight-acting as a red flag.

  2. Dear Friend,

    I am unable to see any reason as to why someone would not say yes to someone as amazing as you.

    But I guess love has her whims, her reasons and her ways. I do hope you become acquainted with your glorious destiny sooner than you think you will be

  3. He clearly left you because you didn't reach the expectations. I been on the other side, if you are extremely "passive", as non-confrontational, they are going to leave, I think in the same manner because we die inside, people trivialise masc gay men, but we truly need, therefore seek, another masc dude, even if things are quite difficult because most masculine men are normatively alexithymic in most cases relationship can be a mess, we feel a drive for it. Aside he was exposing himself in public.

  4. If that’s your worst experience with a gay man, you’ve fared a lot better than I have! Making up that excuse was a bit crap but the overall situation was that you had coffee with somebody and you didn’t click.

  5. Not sure it counts necessarily, but: I once dated a guy that actively worked at a catholic church. Possibly one of the most awkward times of my life. Especially the "clandestine kissing" stuff. Oh, and that he very probably just used me to have an excuse to make his actual boyfriend break up with him by leaving his phone unlocked with our conversations open. Only found out during an odd, Freudian, sin-washing, conversation with him about "that one ex he cheated on and left convos up for him to view explicitly to force him to break the relationship up", that he himself started.
    There is a slim chance I was not involved at all in the shenanigans (never met his ex after all), mind you, but even then, that story creeped the fuck out of me for some yet unexplained reason.
    Moral of the story: churches are for hookups.

  6. I am terrible. It has been years since I have done it, but I've ended a date after 10 minutes. If there is literally no connection I just want to move on.

  7. I'm curious your opinion on semi-in the closet gay men. Most gay guys I know are partially out, out to friends and colleagues but not to family or out to friends but not at work due to no protections from discrimination or being fired over it. My area is a bit conservative/traditional so it's relatively common to be partially still in. I'm out to everyone but like half my family because they've been violent in the past and I don't want to trigger anything, even if I now live quite a distance away. So I have a feeling I'll always be partially in, in some regards just for the safety of myself and others in my family.

  8. I'm late to the video, but I think this dude wanted to hook up with you and not actually date you. so he was disappointed to find that you actually wanted to talk and not just jump his bones.

  9. So idk I gotta a question what if the guy feet are pointed down when they are talking to you? Like you know some people sit with there toes to the floor does that mean there interested? Or just ready to leap away..?

  10. If the presenter "was" gay, this really throws a huge spanner into much of his content's purporting to help gays from the inside.

    Why should being gay not be a concrete part of one's identity? I beat conversion therapy; I fought for it. If other gays want to be open to fluidity, then I'll just channel Miss Brodie and say, "For those who like that sort of thing, that is the sort of thing they like," but acknowledge it early so that we can avoid each other.

    I find masculinity neither a plus nor a minus, but anything straight-leaning is personally a big turnoff.

    I actually brought someone out who pursued me, and it was terrifying at the time, but he's now a huge credit to me.

  11. I am a "FRESHLY" out of the closet guy (well in reality still inside) I have been with this guy for months, it been a crazy experience. But I am thankful he has been so understanding and patient. I can't come out because I work in an extremely conservative religious college. But I am looking for a new job. But having someone who knows what I have experienced (we are both divorced guys previously married to women and we both have children), has helped me immensely. I been accepting myself, and I been able to grow beyond anything I could imagine I would. So its not for everyone to be in this type of relationship. On the flip side one guy totally tried to shame me for being in the closet, and made me believe I was the worst type of person. And how me being in the closet was a disservice to all gay men who worked so hard to be accepted. So, in conclusion, live your life, come out when its best for you, if you are patient and find the right person, things will fall into place. We are both happy and we have even talk about marriage in the future, but time will tell.

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