Auburn Coach Wife Kristi Malzahn Agrees with Match & eHarmony: Men are Jerks

My advice is this: Settle! That’s right. Don’t worry about passion or intense connection. Don’t nix a guy based on his annoying habit of yelling “Bravo!” in movie theaters. Overlook his halitosis or abysmal sense of aesthetics. Because if you want to have the infrastructure in place to have a family, settling is the way to go. Based on my observations, in fact, settling will probably make you happier in the long run, since many of those who marry with great expectations become more disillusioned with each passing year. (It’s hard to maintain that level of zing when the conversation morphs into discussions about who’s changing the diapers or balancing the checkbook.)

Obviously, I wasn’t always an advocate of settling. In fact, it took not settling to make me realize that settling is the better option, and even though settling is a rampant phenomenon, talking about it in a positive light makes people profoundly uncomfortable. Whenever I make the case for settling, people look at me with creased brows of disapproval or frowns of disappointment, the way a child might look at an older sibling who just informed her that Jerry’s Kids aren’t going to walk, even if you send them money. It’s not only politically incorrect to get behind settling, it’s downright un-American. Our culture tells us to keep our eyes on the prize (while our mothers, who know better, tell us not to be so picky), and the theme of holding out for true love (whatever that is—look at the divorce rate) permeates our collective mentality.

Even situation comedies, starting in the 1970s with The Mary Tyler Moore Show and going all the way to Friends, feature endearing single women in the dating trenches, and there’s supposed to be something romantic and even heroic about their search for true love. Of course, the crucial difference is that, whereas the earlier series begins after Mary has been jilted by her fiancé, the more modern-day Friends opens as Rachel Green leaves her nice-guy orthodontist fiancé at the altar simply because she isn’t feeling it. But either way, in episode after episode, as both women continue to be unlucky in love, settling starts to look pretty darn appealing. Mary is supposed to be contentedly independent and fulfilled by her newsroom family, but in fact her life seems lonely. Are we to assume that at the end of the series, Mary, by then in her late 30s, found her soul mate after the lights in the newsroom went out and her work family was disbanded? If her experience was anything like mine or that of my single friends, it’s unlikely.

And while Rachel and her supposed soul mate, Ross, finally get together (for the umpteenth time) in the finale of Friends, do we feel confident that she’ll be happier with Ross than she would have been had she settled down with Barry, the orthodontist, 10 years earlier? She and Ross have passion but have never had long-term stability, and the fireworks she experiences with him but not with Barry might actually turn out to be a liability, given how many times their relationship has already gone up in flames. It’s equally questionable whether Sex and the City’s Carrie Bradshaw, who cheated on her kindhearted and generous boyfriend, Aidan, only to end up with the more exciting but self-absorbed Mr. Big, will be better off in the framework of marriage and family. (Some time after the breakup, when Carrie ran into Aidan on the street, he was carrying his infant in a Baby Björn. Can anyone imagine Mr. Big walking around with a Björn?)

38 COMMENTS

  1. Honesty: It's in our DNA because females select jerks to mate with. Trying to overcome it makes one finish last. Be a jerk.
    More honesty: This is her brain on toxoplasma gondii

  2. Listen ladies. We men are dogs. Even the most so called faithful Christian man is still a sinner and stumbles… almost every day. So keep that in mind and you will not be disappointed. And the guy that disagree with this… then I say, "get behind me Satan, before I beat the shit out you."

  3. If you search "ferocious disappointment and bannana flavored dildo in your mothers religion"………..Seriously, no joke………..Search it, and you will come up with exactly one result.
    This crop of crap offering (from some moron) will be the very top result…….As well as the singular and only result.
    All the proof you should need to finally understand that…….You are a (hopelessly lost forever moron), if you search for advice, and then trust the ass holes that promise you salvation.
    You are being used; Burn these fuckers to the ground if they continue to be so cynical.

  4. By the comments on this video this woman is absolutely right. And the worry is too many women think along. They're just happy with the jerks and put up with it like a duty.

  5. This woman was given the life most women dream of, and to say I am so glad my kids are gone, she should experience one fact, some kids never come back. a cop bangs on your door, are you going to bask in the fact you will never see them again?…to you Lady, you are selfish and I do not like you. As far as your husband goes, he is the success, you shame to say are just his wife, nobody wants your autograph, and quit acting like you are all that when you have done nothing but marry a successful man. Hey welcome to my world you BITCH!

  6. There are like 500 women to each man, because some women decide to let their boys be gay, trans sexual, or bi sexual tragedies. So either women become patient or raise their boys to be men! But men are the jerks, please don't add controversy to natural cognition.

  7. I hate ur shit show of entertainment give up u fucking fail i want I to suck eggs with ur 5th grader looking ass and ur animations are terrible all it is is foxes moving their heads up and down, blinking, and moving their tales

  8. and WHO knifed down a nice and loving london NURSE on the street by daylight ??? THREE LAUGHING, CYNICAL, EVIL AND DIRTY SCUM GIRLS SHOUTING " ALLAH AKBAR!" . so much as to " MEN are jerks " ….

  9. I got here from You dare call someone a moron just for trying to experience life and live a little? Sure, real safe for you in your mothers basement just calling adventurous people morons. Your comment literally highlights the amount of ignorance that still remains in our world, and you should actually go out and maybe stop passing on knowledge that you've read in a book your mum gave you when you were six, okay? I'm trying to be helpful here, but you give me a headache and your unhelpfulness and irritating know-it-allness is just a complete pain in the ass for everyone around you, but I'm sure you already have heard this a million times but your ego is just far too strong that you don't allow yourself to listen to anyone. Your arrogance kind of reminds me of Spongebob (in the simplest way that a child like you would understand) because everyone hates you except for your really dumb best friend, so you think everythings okay. Squidward especially hates you and shows it, and constantly tries to get away from you but your arrogance is so huge and spreads from land to land that not even Squidward can get away from you. Please don't reply, I'm afraid that if you do I might catch just a little bit of your ignorance and it is far too late in the day for me to want to listen to you at all. Go and have some alcohol, it might kill just the right braincells for you to be able to get back on with your life and might actually improve your day. Have a good one, and please do not reply.

  10. This was the only video that came up after I typed in the search tab: paid in dimes when the morning is up and the sunshine is burning through your eye sockets and penetrating through your skull and there's a sound of music in the air and you realize that you don't have any time left to start the feast, so you complete the feast without your favourite pants, because your pants are stained with blood from all the victims you killed, the victims, who were from another dimension, a dimension you cooked up in the lab while you worked as a social justice warrior for the black community of russia and you drank tea with the cubans in russia while singing chinese folk songs

  11. Must Do assignment

    The minority I picked for the Asian Americans because I am an Asian. I think that Asians are interesting because they is so much more of Asia than any other continent. But they also have the second worst leader in North Korea (First being Trump). Many of America’s Allies and enemies are Asian. Like Japan one of America's enemies in WWII.

    Also many Asian/Americans fought in the American civil war. About a quarter of the Chinese Americans who lived in the eastern states fought in the civil war. Even with all Chinese that fought in the Civil war only 1 was born in America. So I wasn't there war to fight but even though they still fought.

    Now for the Woman I will pick Harriet Tubman since she was a prominent person in the slavery movement. She rescued hundreds of slaves with the help of the Underground Railroad. She was also born into slavery in Maryland in 1820. She escaped from her owners in 1849. After that she went back even with a risk of getting caught. She saved her family and friends.

    On top of all that she worked for the Union Army during the war. After the war she decided to help the weak and elderly former slaves. They even decided replace Andrew Jackson on the center of the $20 bill. She was a Activist and a Civil rights Activist and lived from 1820-1913. And overall was one of the strongest woman figures of all time.

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